Hello everyone,
As promised here is my poem after all the editing is finished. You can pretty much tell the changes in it. If not, then read the post "Completion".

“Completion” (2nd draft)

Love comes in many forms,
What form do I want,
What form do I seek,
What form have I found?

Is it an intense feeling of affection;
A deep romantic or sexual attachment;
An object of liking;
Or its own purifying description?

When love ran into me,
It was an unrecognizable substance.
Flowing through my veins,
Soon becoming an addiction,
As if something I needed to survive.
It’s an uncommon feeling surrounding my inner most thoughts,
Coming up from behind; taking me off guard.
Opening up my eyes, and revealing what I’ve found.

I eliminated sex and the feelings involved,
I treasured the difference makers.
I strived for meaningful and caring acts.
I eventually put the pieces together,
Solving my broken puzzle.
Thinking for years,
Months, days, and hours.

What was keeping me from solving this?
Betrayal, denial, or confusion?
Fear from being hurt,
Or having to face a new obstacle?
When I gained the courage to start solving,
I didn’t know what the puzzle was to look like.
I didn’t know what I was looking for as the outer edges,
Or the inner pieces.
I didn’t know what Love I wanted to discover,
Or what the love might mean.

I thought finding a companion would be it,
Snuggling at night,
Cuddling during the day.
Sharing secrets, and sweet kisses.

Then I found out I was seeking for more,
Something beyond touching.
My soul needed the touching,
The companion couldn’t provide this.

Then there is this love that you receive from family.
I haven’t quite embraced this love.
I try grasping onto a far more deeper connection.
A connection with someone to watch over me; protect me.
Someone to love me, guide me, and notice me.

The love that I have found doesn’t come along everyday.
It slips through the cracks in my wall;
Slowly my wall starts to break.
Letting this sensation flow through,
Bringing me happiness and joy;
As if my life is becoming complete.

This love is between two people,
Different in many ways,
But similar in mind.

Who are these two that control this love,
Who are hidden between these lines,
Who keeps the heart of one beating,
While the other’s beating heart slowly writes these words?
All I can say is the two are me and you.

I’m the writer.
You’re the giver.
You breathe life into me;
Allowing my heart to continue beating.
When I sought love,
You gave it.
Showing me how much you cared;
Letting me solve my puzzle.

The times spent talking,
Spent laughing.
Hours telling tales,
And hours just staring.
No words are spoken,
Yet the eyes meet.
Those times I cherish the most.

We’re like mimes-
We can see through the box,
We just can’t move out.
The bond grows with every moment shared.
Every spoken word,
And every stare.

Once I realized what I had,
I thought it was too late.
Two weeks into summer,
And my heart was breaking.
Why? What had happened?

The bond was fading,
The love was disappearing.
It was the company I missed,
The quiet stares,
The long talks.
That’s when I knew...
It had to be Love.

When I awake in the morning,
And I’m really down,
I come across your face,
And it all washes away.
Suddenly I’m happy;
It’s like I’m complete.
Your stare accomplished that...
Not alone, but through Love.

Will I be able to look into your eyes,
And know you feel the same?
If I asked would you reveal the truth;
Or keep it hidden; allow the questions to continue?

This Love keeps my soul alive,
Without it, I’m frozen in fear.
My life will continue on,
But my soul will wilt and die.
Just to let you know,
Through this love, you have made me whole.

By: Ginger Lorraine Smith
First draft on 1/26/06
This completed on 2/4/06

Please tell me what you think. Im going to give this one back to Mr.Walker, so that he can do some more editing. Im not going to stop til I think its perfect. Which, I can tell Im getting close. Til Then, PeAcE!
-Gigi

Hello everyone, Today was a good day. We had a bad storm last night, and we lost power. But I slept through it. I made it through school with my frog voice, runny nose, and forming ear aches. I don't know what else to say. I passed my Algebra 2 honors test with ease, the Biology test Im a little skeptical about, but I get more time on Monday. So Im sure to study some more. I probably got my first B on the spanish test like all year. Its possible that I got an A though. (IM NOT DOUBTING MY ABILITIES). I went to Mr.Walkers class, and he gave me information on the England trip this summer. Im going to try to get some work in, and talk to family to maybe getting money so that I can go. Also, Mr. Walker gave me back my poem "Completion". He said overall it was outstanding. He had some marks on my papers, and it really showed my places where I need some more help on. So this weekend is dedicated on editing that. Im already on a roll, but Im going to sleep now. So I might finish tomorrow, we will see. If not then by Sunday I should be finished. Tomorrow I have to go to my little cousins b-day party. Then Sunday is Superbowl Sunday. I hate both teams, but Im rooting for the Steelers because they knocked the Colts out, and the Colts are my team. So if they are good enough to knock us out, then they better win the bowl. Then again, I wouldn't mind seeing them lose, have Jerome Bettis retire by losing the Superbowl. HAHAHA. Well everyone that knows the situation with my parents, help me pray for them to stop smoking. I tried preaching to them again today. And I know the Christian in this household. Pray that Jolene has a great delivery, and Seth James Statton is a healthy baby. (He will be my 2nd cousin). Im off to bed now. Til Then, PeAcE! -Ginger

“Angel from God”
Sinking below almost to my death,
Starting to run out of breath.
When I got a sign from God,
I remember that similar nod.

It’s a nod from a fellow friend,
This friend was sent to help mend,
Mend my battered soul,
Help fill my hearts hole.

This friend came to me one day,
They promised never to betray.
They would be there til the very end,
This was my true friend.

I sit in the afternoon,
Looking at the sun and moon,
Waiting for this dear friend,
To rescue me yet again.

My face is sure to shine,
Around this friend that is so divine.
Leading the way,
Giving me the time of day.

Walking the streets,
I feel all the defeats,
They crash down on my shoulders,
Crushing blows, rolling over like boulders.

It seems like noone cares,
So I decide to shed some tears.
Then my friends hand is extended,
It seems like it all has ended.

With all the given stares,
Being mixed with my greatest fears,
This friend encourages me that God cares,
And I notice that He had answered my prayers.

I look up to the sky above,
I see a beautiful white dove.
Everything that I had denied,
Was sitting right by my side.

The love of this dear friend,
I was starting to comprehend,
They give me a light nod,
And I realized they are my Angel from God.

-Ginger 2/1/06

Truth to this poem, This is not true, and it is my first poem that I have written that is not based on a past experience in life. This is more like a dream of mine, and maybe the second to last stanza might be true, but I just haven't noticed what was sitting by my side. One day, I will find that Angel, maybe I already have, but I don't know if that person knows, or if I even know myself.

Well, thats it for me for today. I have Algebra 2 homework, Biology Homework, and I have to print out some recipes for homework. Got a major Algebra 2 test, Biology, and Spanish test tomorrow, so I have to study. Have a good night everyone, and help me get over this cold before it really gets bad. I have a sore throat. URG, and these cough/throat drops just make me sneeze, but Id rather sneeze then not breathe! Time to feed Tyson, and take him outside, then off to homework. Til Then, PeAcE!
-Ginger

“Hide”
Sitting with my head in my arms,
Listening to the steps around.
Feet walk by and by,
Laughing and pointing fingers,
They think they know me,
But they don’t know what I hide.

They imagine me as a survivor,
One in a million,
One to overcome the odds,
But I hide some pieces and scars.
I have my days, I have my times,
I am what they imagine, I believe I am,
Yet, I can’t block out the truth,
Can’t erase the past.

Deep down inside,
I imagine we’re all the same.
Hiding the truth,
And putting on a false face.
Deep down, we’re all in hiding.

But why do we point and laugh?
If we all have our doubts, and regrets,
Our insecurities, and our mistakes.
Its torture to each other, and we continue on.
We put on a fake smile, and hurt the inner soul of others,
Trying to ease our pain, but stomping on one another’s.

Shutting down the peaceful ones,
Rising the cruel ones.
Egging on the intimidating ones,
Fighting the faithful ones.
Loving the false ones,
But most of all we’re crushing the true ones.

Why don’t we change,
Open up and heal ourselves with hope and love.
Lets not battle wounds with wounds,
But heal these scars.
Shatter the glass walls hiding the truth,
And crush the masks of all the fakes!

-Ginger Smith 2/1/06

Ok, what this poem means: The first two stanzas are about my person experiences, and how I feel sometimes. How my fellow peers laugh, and point fingers at me because Im different. How they act like they know me, but yet they don't get to know my inner self, and what exactly makes me Ginger Lorraine Smith. Even when I told people about my past, they didn't know the whole truth to it. They concider me a lucky one because I was able to turn away from drugs and overcome all of that. But in reality, Im not lucky, Ive just got God to thank for that.
The next stanza is what I think. I think that everyone is hiding something from others. They are just like me, they keep it hidden.
The next stanza is just me reflecting how I wonder why we do the things we do. Why we point and laugh at others for the differences. We all have something we've done in the past that we regret, we have our doubts in life, we have our insecurities, and we all have mistakes. But we decide to just laugh at others when we find out their problems, or new obstacles that they face. Its torture, thats what it is, we think it gets a little laugh out of you, and it eases your pain for a moment. But your just hurting someones soul more, causing the soul to feel unloved or uncared for.
The next stanza is my favorite, because we all know we do this. When you run across a peaceful one, you shut them down. When you see a cruel one, you rise their cruelity to another level to do something negative. We egg on the intimidating ones, and they scare away the shy ones. We fight the faithful ones, trying to make them lose faith. We love the false ones, but everyone knows that we crush the true ones.
The next stanza is my challenge to the world. Why don't we try to change our ways. Why don't we all try to heal with hope for healing, and love from others? Lets not battle bad with bad, evil with evil, fake with fake, or wounds with wounds. But lets try and heal these scars. You can see the people that hide, but you can't break through to them to know them, so lets shatter that glass wall, and crush the masks of all the fakes!

Sincerely,
Ginger Lorraine Smith

Hello everyone,
This is my late update on the rumors/backstabbers. Sorry I didn't get to it yesterday, I was booked with other things. I am yet again booked today, so Im going to have to make this short.

Wednesday morning, I went to the deans office with Catie, and Dean Burnett made us both write statements. Plan and simple we wrote down everything, and the truth. Deputy Harper came in and read over them. He made a comment, "I wish the murder cases wrote statements like this, they just put 'I saw him shoot him'. " I thought that was very funny...

Anyway, Dean Burnett called Brett up there, and we got everything settled. There were more things I heard later on in the day that really ticked me off, but I blew it off, cause I don't want to let it continue on. At lunch, I went and talked 1 on 1 with Brett. We shook hands, and agreed to be friends again. Lindsay and I on the other hand, I don't think will ever be friends again.

My locker wasn't broken into by Brett, and Brett doesn't know who did it. But Deputy Harper is sure that somebody tried by the way the lock was beat up. I got a new lock, and everything is settled in that area too. I think that's about it. Lindsay is in Alabama til Monday, so Im happy with that. WHOO HOO!!! Mr.Walker is still editing my poem "Completion" He said he will try to have it back to me tomorrow.

Well, Im going to post a few more poems that I wrote.